It's Monday. 43 days down, 43 days left to go. I feel good about this. We've reached the halfway point, right? We made it to the top and now we just coast down for 43 more days. The kids had a decent day today. School work was pretty good, no major catastrophes, I was productive with my work. We got the house and fence power washed. It looks good - nice and clean and smelling like bleach. A nice way to start the week - fresh and clean. We can do this!
My day didn't start off well. I discovered my dear daughter had not been checking her school email (she "didn't know she was supposed to") and had 118 unread messages from her teachers. In addition to managing my own anxiety over having that many unread messages, I then had to sit down with her to go through everything and help her get organized. I remember posting last week that she was pretty independent and only came to me when she had questions. Well, apparently I only thought she was independent. She actually was missing all sorts of things. Nothing major, otherwise her teachers would've reached out to me. But enough that I felt bad for her. Cue #momguilt. I don't know why I feel like her performance reflects badly on me, but I'm sure I'm not the only parent out there who does. Then I feel guilty that this has been going on so long and I didn't catch it. I keep reminding myself that, although technology is part of MY usual work day, it has no...
I woke up this morning and a feeling of helplessness washed over me. All the unknowns are creeping up and threatening to smother me. It's a wave that comes over and over again. I get to the top of one and then another hits. I have always been a planner. Sometimes I worry. But I very rarely have anxiety. I try to focus on what I know and what I have control over. What DO I know? I know what will happen for the next 4 weeks. I know the kids have school until May 22 and I will do my best to balance it with work. Got it. I can do that. But what happens after that? What will they do all day when school ends and I'm still working and camps haven't started up yet? What if camps never start? Do I cancel the camps now and try to get some money back? Or do I wait and see if they cancel and give me a refund? Do I move their camps to later in the summer when they're more likely to happen? But if I wait to see if the June camps are cancelled then all the July and August camps mi...
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